I’ve just got back from an amazing week in Italy, one of my favourite places in the world – at Lake Garda (highly recommend it, if you’ve never been!).
I first went to Italy when we went to Lake Como for our honeymoon. We have been back several times since and absolutely love it, the beautiful scenery and weather and of course, the gorgeous Italian food and drink. It’s just such a relaxed attitude, it all makes for the perfect getaway.
Anyway! The reason we went was to celebrate my birthday. Today I want to chat about how to stop spending getting out of control, because birthdays are – of course – a time for presents. The trouble is that now you’re earning so much more than you were, it’s easy to end up spending so much more money on ‘stuff’. And then you get to the end of the month or year and wonder where it’s all gone, with nothing much to really show for all your hard work.
Once you’ve done your home improvements and revamped your wardrobe and bought those amazing shoes you wanted (and everything else that was on your list), often business owners start spending money on their friends and family. Which is great obviously, but it can get out of control.
It’s not something I really see talked about much, but I’m sure you know what I mean!
Like those birthday presents you used to spend £10 or £15 on – now that you’re bringing in decent money, it’s easy to spend £100 or £200 on a present for birthdays or weddings or Christmas, and before you know it you’ve spent a small fortune.
If it’s a conscious, deliberate choice that makes you feel amazing, that’s great. I’m obviously not here to judge or tell you how to spend your cash! I like to splash out on presents sometimes too.
But the challenge is that when you spend your money on those gifts, you can’t spend it on other things, that have deeper meaning for you or actively grow your wealth. So if buying pricier gifts is something you’ve slipped into because you have more money – rather than mindfully deciding it’s actually where you WANT to invest – it’s definitely worth looking at properly.
So here’s my top tips, to avoid spending more than you really want to!
Firstly… set a budget.
I know, I know. I talk about budgets all the time (for good reason – stick with me here!).
Maybe you resist budgeting because you love to feel expansive and abundant, and budgeting feels a bit restrictive.
The truth is that budgeting actually gives you MORE freedom, rather than less – because you’re managing your finances in a way that means the money is there to do and have MORE of what you truly want in life, rather than just spending it randomly.
If you are using a money pot system like I recommend for my clients, you’re likely to have a pot of money specifically for presents and Christmas and birthdays and other annual expenses. So have a think about how much money you want to go into this pot over a year.
How many people do you want to buy for? Your children and your parents? Have you got siblings? What about friends? In-laws? Do you need to add some extra money in there to allow for friends that are getting married or for housewarming gifts or have ‘big’ birthdays? What about nieces and nephews? Do you celebrate Mother’s Day or Father’s Day? Valentine’s Day? Anniversaries?
Even just writing this reminds me how quickly it can all stack up!
Jot down ALL the people you want to buy a present for and then have a think about realistically, the appropriate amount you want to set to spend on them. Add it up and you know how much money you need for the year. Then simply divide this by 12 to work out how much to put into your present fund (or whatever you want to call it) each month – a separate account or ‘pot’ of money within your online banking app, that allows you to have money put aside for a certain purpose.
Obviously it’s not up to me to say how much money you ‘should’ spend on yourself or anyone else. This is only ever about what feels right for you.
But ultimately, you can only spend your money once. If you start buying £100 presents for everybody you know, you’re not going to have that money to spend on the other things that are important to you. And whether or not you’re a budgeting type of person, adding it all up like this for a year can help you see if that’s actually where you want that cash to go.
It might be that being generous and spending your money on other people is the thing that’s most important to you. But equally, it might be that you’ve got other goals and dreams.
My second tip here is to ask the people who you regularly buy presents for, if they could set up a wish list of things they actually want – maybe on Amazon or another online store – so that you can watch out for those things being on offer.
If it’s in the back of your mind that your nephew really wants a Kindle, when you spot it with 25% off in June, you can put it away for Christmas. Which has got to be better than having to pay full price on 5th December (or shelling out £££ on something kind and thoughtful, but which may end up sitting in your nephew’s cupboard, unused and unloved).
It’s the same as being able to take advantage of Black Friday sales or other events – and always way easier if you know what people actually want.
I’ve said before that there are luxuries I love to buy (especially skin care), but I do try to get them when they’re on offer. You’ve worked hard to create your income, why pay more than you have to?
Just because you’re earning good money now doesn’t mean that you can’t look out for discounts and bargains. No matter how much you’re making these days, it’s about using that money well!
And my third tip today is to question whether you actually want to buy things for people, or whether you might be better to use the money on experiences or things you can do together.
I’ve got a friend who openly admits that she doesn’t like cooking. Every year she invites people over to her house and gets a personal chef in for Christmas, who cooks an amazing meal for all her family. But because she spends the money on that, she doesn’t then buy presents for those people. She still buys presents for her kids but the rest of the immediate family don’t get presents, because they know that wonderful meal is her gift to them.
So maybe have a think about what’s important to you. And if it’s spending time with your friends and family – which let’s face it, is more important than ever as our lives get busier – maybe think about something that you could do with them. Maybe you could book a holiday or a day out and invite them all to come along (another friend did this recently and instead of giving a gift, booked a narrowboat for all her friends and family, to celebrate a big birthday. Which turned out to be a hilarious and memorable day for everyone!).
Maybe you get a personal chef – but whatever you do, it’s about making an informed, intentional choice about what you spend your money on. Rather than just letting it get to the point where you’re spending £10 on a present here, £30 on flowers there, £120 there and before you know it, you haven’t got the money for what you really want.
Of course, knowing what you want is also crucial! And having that crystal clear picture in your mind, of exactly what it is that you’re working towards.
When we work together 1:1, the first step of the process is always to create a plan. We look at what’s really important to you – often using a vision board – and then come up with a step-by-step plan and process of how to get there.
As part of this, we also look at how you spend your money. How do you currently spend it? What do you spend it on? And would you like to be spending it differently?
Sometimes people will look at this and realise they want to spend more money on grocery shopping, so that they can go organic or buy better quality produce for their family. Other people might realise they’re paying £80 a month for Sky TV but never watching it, and decide to take the money from there and put it towards something more important instead (like saving for the kids university fees or becoming mortgage free or booking that dream holiday!).
The point is that you make a conscious choice about your spending – so if you want to have a big pot of money for presents, that’s absolutely fine. But you need to be putting the right amount of money into that pot for YOU, so that you don’t end up buying presents for people at the expense of working towards your long term goals.
The truth is that it’s much harder to make the time and figure this stuff out and then stick to it by yourself, than it is to work together and have all the support and financial guidance you need.
There are two main ways to work with me right now. The Asset Mastery VIP Day is perfect if you want to take a day out of your business, sit down face-to-face and blitz through all your financial stuff (we can get a LOT done in a day!). The beauty of this is that we can spend as long as we need on each section, rather than squeezing it into hour slots on Zoom, so it really works for you. We’ll meet close to you too, so you don’t have to spend hours travelling.
You’ll leave your VIP Day after an amazing lunch and coffee (and probably cake), with a 100% clear plan of action that you can then sit down and get on with, step by step, with follow-up support on Voxer if you need it. Just click here to message me about a VIP Day and I can fill you in with all the details.
The other option right now is my signature Asset Accelerator™ programme, which has been recently overhauled and uplevelled, to make it even more impactful!
We start with a 1:1 half-day planning session on Zoom, to get your plan sorted, followed by 9 months of support and implementation to put all your big financial plans into action.
Every month you can come to a dedicated (confidential!) ‘Asset Growth and Implementation’ session, carving out that dedicated time to take ACTION on your money stuff and growing your wealth. There’s Q+As, Voxer support and we’ll sit down together 1:1 every 3 months too, to review your progress and keep you on track.
Basically if you know you’re the type of person who can do an away day or a training day and leave feeling all fired up – but then your plan will sit in your inbox forever and you never get around to actually doing it – the Asset Accelerator™ programme is going to be a better fit for you, to get stuff DONE!
If you’re a really good self-starter and once you know what you’re doing, you’re great getting on and doing it – the VIP Day would be a brilliant option for you, to truly sort out your money stuff and get to work on building your wealth, your net worth and bringing more of your dreams to life.
Either way, if you want to find out more, feel free to send me a message here on the website or you can message me here personally on Facebook.
And we can always have a quick call to see which of these options might be best for you!
Until next time,
Claire